This is shaping up to be a week of changes for the food trucks in Dallas and surrounding areas.  With rainy weather and the Thanksgiving holiday, most trucks have cut back on their schedules.  No one is serving breakfast, and only those Crazy Sisters are doing a late night service (Friday and Saturday).

A planned Black Friday Food Truck Park at The Shops at Park Lane has been canceled.  The food trucks, including Gandolfo’s, The Butcher’s Son, Nammi, Ruthie’s, and CupCakin are scrambling to find replacement locations for Black Friday.  Gandolfo’s Randy Wolken has threatened to go cruising for Black Friday lines on Thursday night.

Yum Yum food truck, a mostly-Fort Worth truck, told SideDish that they are hibernating for the Winter, but plan on re-emerging next Spring.

This week is liable to have lots of changes in the schedules.  Check Twitter, Facebook, and we’ll try to update this schedule as often as possible.  Jump for the schedule.

Update: Since the trucks were canceled from The Shops at Park Lane, they (Gandolfo’s, The Butcher’s Son, Nammi, Ruthie’s, and CupCakin) have all now arranged to be at Best Buy Addison for Black Friday.

UPPITY DATE: This link from a adult beverage wholesaler.

Grass does not grow beneath Teresa Gubbins' shoes.

Leave it to Teresa “Gumshoe” Gubbins to find a snitch in Trader Joe’s camp. Since the grocery chain announced they were planning locations in Dallas last May, they have been quite secretive about their locations. According to TG, you can rule out the former location on Greenville Ave. Her Deep Throat coughs up three possible locations: Walnut Hill and Central, Knox Ave., and Fort Worth. All of the details are here.

There was a time when Trader Joe’s was cool and funky and carried stuff you couldn’t find elsewhere, but I think the company is now running on a tired image. In the 70s,  Two Buck Chuck played a significant role in nursing wine drinkers off the Spanada bottle but the last TBC I sampled burned the enamel off my teeth. So, Trader Joe’s? Yes or no? Why?

Hunky Town, Twin Pricks, Tooter’s, Pecker’s Hot Italian Sausage, Tube Steak Junction, Cake Balls to the Walls, Nuts and Butts, Quickies, Long Dong Silver, Tally Whacker’s, Love Mussels, Wee Willie’s, Twig and Berries.

Ladies, the floor is open.

Jon Battle looking victorious outside of Dough on opening day.

Ladies and gentlemen, and I use those terms loosely, meet Jon Battle. He pestered me for months about the opening of Dough in Dallas. He’s a FANatic fan of their pizza. Well, the persistent Mr. Battle was the first official Dallas customer to enter Dough Pizzeria Napoletana when they opened this morning. He took a bunch of nice pictures which I have entered below the jump.

All photos by Jonathon Battle:

The kitchen crew.

Black truffle rollatini.

Rasberry cream Italian soda.

Large "Pork Love" pie.

Polenta cake.

]]> http://sidedish.dmagazine.com/2011/08/16/special-report-first-customer-at-dough-spends-62-for-lunch-sends-pictures-and-report/feed/ 21 http://sidedish.dmagazine.com/2011/08/16/somebody-help-this-poor-boy-calzones-in-dallas/ http://sidedish.dmagazine.com/2011/08/16/somebody-help-this-poor-boy-calzones-in-dallas/#comments Tue, 16 Aug 2011 14:58:32 +0000 Nancy Nichols http://sidedish.dmagazine.com/?p=29046 This kinda sorta rude Disher sez:

Nancy, you all seem to write about Pizza, especially Jay Jerrier’s. Can you move your brain away from Cane Rosso and perhaps tell me about where to get a calzone?

I picked the wrong day to quit feeling chirpy, chirpy, cheep, cheep! (Warning, that song will attach to your brain forever.) And dude, you don’t need to capitalize the P in pizza. Calzone suggestions anyone? Jay?

The Truck by The Tesar.

Chef John Tesar sheds his doucheyness and becomes Extreme Chef winner. He can run 10 miles and cook in a corn field.

Last night John Tesar played a 53-year old geezer chef on a thrilling episode of Food Network’s Extreme Chef. He faced two younger chefs: Joe, a douchey New York dude who was once a private chef for Donald Trump; and Greg, a Portland chef who couldn’t cut it in medical school so he quit and went to the CIA.

Tesar was confident from the start. “I run 10 miles a day,” Tesar gloated. After that, he works all day and night. The competition took place on a 60-acre farm in Malibu Canyon and the premise had the chefs running all over the place to source ingredients.

HEARTY BREAKFAST was the segment. To obtain eggs, the chefs had to conquer a “crop-stical course” made of bales of hay formed into various tunnels and towers. Tesar, a virtual Jack LaLane, was first to the eggs (he picked duck!) and he won the first competition soundly with his ginger and duck egg French toast. (I think there was a fruit salad and some whiskey involved, but I can’t read my notes, and I refuse to rerun the show.) It only matters that when the Simon Cowell wannabe (and lookalike) host announced Tesar as the winner, Tesar took a modest Zen-like bow. Tesar is now the master of “the unconventional use of an egg.”

No, it’s not over. There are still 45 minutes left in the show. Here we go.

EXTREME CHALLENGE! Obnoxious host outlines new rules. Through the screeching music swollen with hundreds of violins, I hear him tell the chefs they have to harvest their own vegetables from the sprawling farm dotted with cute scarecrows. PLUS, they have to roll them around in a wheelbarrow. As winner of round one, or whatever they call it, Tesar not only gets to pick his protein, he has the power to decide what meat the other chefs get. Tesar shoves Joe the pork. (We hate Joe by now and are glad to see he gets the slowest cooking meat!) Sorry, I didn’t write down Dr. Greg’s protein.

The three chefs take off with their wheelbarrows. Tesar looks like he has been pushing one around his whole life. (hidden metaphor) Joe looks like a sweaty vegetable abuser as he rips a fistful of leeks from the ground and throws them into his hot wheelbarrow. Meanwhile, Dr. Greg seems content jumping through the fields. He stops at a row of purple carrots and exclaims, “Rad!” He lives in Portland. We let the comment slide.

Our man Tesar the geezer is first chef to the pantry! I don’t know what he got but he leaves with a devilish smile as he pushes his wheelbarrow towards the prep station. HOLD THE JOHN DEERES! Dr. Greg and his wheelbarrow are sprinting past Tesar toward the prep tables. Tesar suddenly looks 63. His glasses appear heavy and dusty. OH NO! However, poor douchey Joe has just arrived at the pantry! He curses as he pick through what is left. Even though he is losing, he walks back with the arrogance of Donald Trump. Putz.

All chefs are at their stations. WAIT! Something is missing. There are no utensils. No pots or pans. No microplanes. No immersion blenders. OH MY GOD. FIRST X FACTOR! To obtain cooking utensils, the chefs have to run through a dust storm. Huh? Yes, they brought in a bunch of industrial blowers and created a whirling cloud of dust. Like bandits with red and white bandanas covering their faces, the chefs disappear into the swirling dirt. We can barely see them as they rip through crates and grab whatever they can before they choke. None of them know what they have till they get back to the prep station. (I was on the edge of my couch for this!) Tesar scores in the dark: TWO saute pans AND a sauce pan. And a shovel? Oh well, he’s got the lamb. We’re so glad Joe has the slowest cooking protein and the worst pan he could have picked—a deep Dutch oven.

Tesar, ever the glutton for punishment, decides to do lamb three ways. (Old farm joke?) He’s cocky and confident at this point. He takes out the leg of lamb and carves tartare, carpaccio, and little medallions to roast. Cue the Now-Irritating Host: TWENTY FIVE MINUTES, CHEFS! NEXT X FACTOR.

First tight camera shot goes to Dr. Greg. I think he is going to cry. He is obviously wishing he’d become a urologist. Joe is stoic. He has perfected the hateful Trump stare. Tesar is ready to play. “YOU MUST PREPARE A DESSERT COURSE,” host dude screams over the violins. “YOU MUST USE MILK FROM A COW. AND YOU MUST MILK THE COW TO GET THE MILK.”

Of course, this involves running to the barn where the cows are waiting. Ever the teat man, Tesar takes a pail and milks away like a pro. Dr. Greg is handling his cow pretty well, too. Perhaps he should have considered gynecology.  Hateful Joe is standing beside his Elsie with  a look that would scare The Donald. “Um, we don’t have cows on the subway,” Joe says. Huh? This allegedly Michelin-star chef takes a stinking subway? Besides that, why would anyone expect to see a real cow on a subway platform in New York. I figure he lost his mind in the dust storm. For a split second my allegiance switches to Joe. I think he needs the 10 grand to pay for a shrink and a few cabs.

Then, as the song goes, the cow kicked it over and winked her eye at the pathetic chef from Trump Towers. “He kicked me,” Joe said. (I screamed from my couch, “It’s a SHE you dumb ass!”) It didn’t matter. Joe claims the cow kicked him. I rewound the tape three times. Ruling: Joe shoved the pail into the cow’s leg. The cow was simply reacting to being approached by an awkward New Yorker. There was no contact. “That’s it,” Joe, the douchey chef, says as he walks off. “I put safety first.”

Then comes my favorite moment of the show. From his little stool beside the cow, Tesar looks up to the camera and says, “Look, he’s crying like a baby.” This was not a Trump moment for Joe. “He’s toast!” we scream.

Sorry, this is getting too long. The rest of the show was pretty painful. We knew Joe was gone. The only tension remained between the good doctor from Portland and Farmer John. Tesar sang with confidence when he presented his dishes. He dazzled the judges with his lamb three ways and his raw milk and chocolate creme anglaise filled with berries. “Not bad for out in the field,” Tesar said with a smirl. (Half smile; half smirk) I forgot what Greg made but it had a lot of fresh vegetables in it and the judges loved it. Mr. Not-So-G.I. Joe tried to justify his existence as a real chef by saying, “I always put safety first in my kitchen.” Judges didn’t buy it. Joe was sent back to his stop on the C Line.

Yes, there is another round. SHOWDOWN! Greg v John! Greg tosses out a taunting challenge: “I can beat that old man.” Ouch. Now, Portland or no Portland, I don’t like him. His wretched twisty hair is starting to drive me nuts. I want to whirl it in my immersion blender. Anywhoo, the two chefs have to prepare “one bite on a silver spoon” using four hidden ingredients. Of course, they have to run after a moving flatbed truck and jump on the back to get to them. As the two chefs sprint behind the truck, I begin to doubt Tesar’s claim that he runs 10 miles a day. Greg jumps on the truck like Spiderman and breaks into the case containing corn, truffles, Kobe beef, and Brussels sprouts. Hold it. A miracle: Tesar’s right by his side!

They run back to the prep station. HOLY CRAP, BATMAN! They arrive to find only a blow torch, a clamp, and a saw to work with. Undaunted, Tesar heads to the pantry and picks up some eggs. My gosh he is so confident. He wipes his sweaty brow and gloats, “I am the egg man. You can cook anywhere if you know what you’re doing.”

The Beatles reference is lost on the bad doctor and struggling chef Greg. He’s too young. Plus he is very busy sawing the fat off the Kobe beef (huh?) which he plans to cook with fruit. Again, we grant him Portland status and wait with anticipation.

The show now makes a wretched attempt to create drama during THE TASTING AND JUDGING section. Obnoxious Host with his now- grating foreign accent, readies for his close-up: “Chefs, this was the longest day of your culinary lives,” he screams. We wait while the camera moves from Greg to John and back again. “And the winner is…” Again with the panning camera. “Chef John!”

As the defeated chef (and doctor) Greg heads down a row of crops into the culinary sunset, Chef John—Extreme Chef John—hits Obnoxious Host with a quick knuckle touch before raising his fists to the skies. “Fifty is the new 30,” Tesar says. “I am the Extreme Chef.”

–DELETE RECORDING–

Fans, just wanted to let you know that YELP has been removing our 5 star reviews for our McKinney location, we have talked to them and they have told us we can’t do anything about it. YELP has been unfair and removed 24 reviews all of which were 4 and 5 stars. But they keep calling us to advertise, and told us it would get better if we advertised. It’s all about making money, what a shame they used to be a great site.

Ouch! Maybe their cyber technicians can detect comments left by the same person. I don’t know. However, this morning comes a note from another just-as-loyal Disher.

I think you’d better take a seat and get ready for this rumble. Oh, and if you know Jack Perkins of Maple & Motor, you might want to text him a link. Okay? Let’s go.

Loyal Disher writes:

I’m sure you have seen this article about Yelp’s impact on restaurants [Ed. Note: I have now!] I use Yelp mainly when I’m going out of town but I use similar sites – Urbanspoon and Trip Advisor more often. I think the sites are relevant and have credibility. It’s interesting that so many restaurant owners seem to despise Yelp and think the reviewers who give them negative feedback are unknowledgeable.  One doesn’t have to look any further than Jack Perkins (M&M). He seems to be on a personal crusade to dispute anything negative said about him or his restaurant. Anywhere he can, he posts brash, bombastic rebuttals to reviewers (except for Yelp — I heard he got booted off Yelp for his harassment of reviewers.) I’ve seen other snide comments about Yelp and its users from other restaurant owners on their Facebook page.

I wondered what you, and more importantly, your readers think of Yelp and a restaurant owner who argues incessantly with reviewers that he doesn’t like.  I like Maple and Motor just fine and have no problem with the restaurant’s policies (I actually like them) but I can’t get past the blatant “you can go to hell if you have a complaint or issue with my restaurant” attitude.  I’m sure many restaurant owners have wanted to tell a paying customer where to go — but have thought twice. Where is the respect for the customer?   Has Yelp and similar sites caused this animosity towards customers?

Yow. Zah. What a crazy world we live in. I don’t think of Yelp, so I’m no help.  So, here’s the deal. Do you use Yelp, Urbanspoon, or Trip Advisor? If so, which one do you find the most useful? Have you had comments deleted?

Restaurant owners: I think I could get pissed by anonymous people leaving remarks about experiences in my restaurant. I remember Hector Garcia telling us about the four-top who that walked in and announced “Table for four. We are Yelpers.” Everybody is a food critic without standards. Speak up Dishers, Yelpers, Spooners, and Advisors.

If you spot the word YUM in a post after today, you will win a prize. Carry on.