Guy Fieri’s American Kitchen & Bar in New York is Beyond Bad

Upside down shot of burger.

I’m sure New York Times restaurant critic Pete Wells doesn’t need my validation of his scathing review of Guy Fieri’s American Kitchen & Bar. But last Thursday I decided to give it a try. It wasn’t a premeditated meal, it was purely spontaneous act. I’d gone to New York to see some plays and stayed near Times Square because I wanted to be able to walk to the theaters. I had no interest in doing anything else except read and sleep. I  wanted to rest my palate and stay away from fine dining. That’s easy to do in Times Square. However, my friend and I passed Fieri’s 500-seat behemoth of a restaurant several times a day and we couldn’t resist trying it out.

I’ll be brief: three of us sat down at 1:30 on Thursday and there were 28 people in the restaurant. We split an order of egg rolls, a hamburger, and a bowl of tortilla soup. I spit out the one bite I took of the eggroll. The consistency of the meat was mushy, almost liquid like regurgitated cat food. The $18.50 burger MAY have had a quarter pound of meat somewhere between those thick buns with a bouffant of iceberg lettuce strands created by running it through a meat slicer which is pure lettuce abuse.

I realize Fieri has helped a lot of mom and pop restaurants get huge boosts in their business after appearing on his Food Network show Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. I’m sure underneath all of that Paul Dean-style jargon such as “Go Big or Go Home” encouraging diners to eat fried food there is an artery-clogged heart of gold, but his investors can’t be too happy with the crap coming out of the kitchen. Or the fact that the restaurant was dead every time we passed it. The swag shop alone is bigger than most Dallas restaurants. American Kitchen & Bar feels like it’s trying to be the new Hard Rock Café.  If you find yourself staying in a hotel in Times Square and you pass the place four times a day, stay away. You’re better off at Carmine’s next door.

A Somewhat Cogent Review of Meat Fight

Alice Laussade woke up this morning still covered with glitter. Normally, that would indicate the previous night’s activities included a lap dance. Not so in this case. Laussade, aka The Cheap Bastard, and her husband Mike put on Meat Fight yesterday at Sons of Hermann Hall. All the signage — the Meat Fight sign hanging above the judges’ table, the signs for the various meat stations — was done in glitter. Though it occurs to me now, as I type this, that I didn’t think to ask Laussade today whether she got a lap dance yesterday. So that possibility can’t yet be ruled out yet.

The fighters yesterday included: Jack Perkins (Maple & Motor), Chad Houser (Cafe Momentum), Tiffany Derry (Private Social), Matt McCallister (FT33), Cody Sharp (The Front Room), Jeffery Hobbs, Jeana Johnson (Acme F&B Good 2 Go Taco), Jeff Bekavac (Neighborhood Services), Eric Hansen (Il Cane Rosso), Randall Copeland (Restaurant AVA), Omar Flores (Driftwood), and Brian Luscher (The Grape).

The latter spent a sleepless night at the Grape, tending his fire. And it paid off. Luscher captained the winning team, whose name was Meatallica. In the individual categories, Bekavac won best sausage, Flores won best pulled pork, Derry won best pork belly, and Perkins won best Brisket. That was the determination of the judges: Daniel Vaughn (aka the BBQ Snob), Will Fleischman (Lockhart Smokehouse), Tim Byres (Smoke), Justin Fourton (Pecan Lodge), Stephen Joseph (Riverport BBQ), Nick Pencis (Stanley’s Famous Pit BBQ), and Aaron Franklin (aka the Jesus of barbecue from Franklin Barbecue).

Continue reading "A Somewhat Cogent Review of Meat Fight"

About Our New Commenting System

Behold our shiny new toy.

Long-suffering readers of this blog will notice that we’ve deployed a new system for commenting.

Commenters can now log in via Facebook, Twitter, Google, LinkedIn, or accounts from a bunch of other social networks of which most of you have never heard. When you opt for one of these social log-ins, your comments will no longer be subject to moderation before posting. Keep in mind, though, that we are still carefully monitoring comments to ensure they adhere to the decency standards necessary for a civil discussion.

You can still comment on our site as a guest, but guest comments must be approved by a moderator before posting.

Now the new fun stuff that our new commenting allows:

• Once you’re logged in to FrontBurner, SideDish, or FrontRow, you’re logged in to comment on any of those three. (We’ll extend this same comments system to our other blogs at a later date.)

• Share your comments directly to Facebook or Twitter. Just check the appropriate box beneath the comment box before you go to post it.

• Up-vote comments that you like (just hit the thumbs-up symbol)

• You can reply directly to other comments. In fact, you can reply to a reply to a reply to a reply. Just hit the “Reply” link on the comment to which you want to reply.
• You can also help us keep the conversation clean. If you think a comment violates community standards of decorum, hit the red flag. That will alert our crack team of moderators that we may need to remove that comment. We’ll then take a look at it and decide whether it belongs.

Unfortunately, one cost of this transition is that any post published prior to the switch that we’ve made today can no longer be commented upon. It’s a cost we’re willing to accept for a system that we hope will continue to spur insightful conversations among our readers.

Brian Williams and Michael Martensen to Open The Establishment in Knox Henderson

Will oysters become the new taco?

The boys behind Cedars Social, Brian Williams and Michael Martensen, are opening a new place at 4513 Travis Street in the Knox/Henderson area in the space formerly known as Trece. The Establishment will be a bar-centric take on the classic oyster bar and the menu will offer 15 types of oysters and “an ever-changing selection of small plates, house-made charcuterie.” They are scheduled to open in early December. To kick off their love of oysters, they will host Oyster Fest this Sunday, October 28. The event will take place from 2:00– 6:00 p.m. in the parking lot next to the soon-to-open restaurant/bar. Just look for the tents, $1 oysters, $5 Palm Beer, $5 Aylesbury Duck Vodka Oyster Shooters, and $10 Etoile Sparkling Wine.

March of Dimes Signature Chef Auction Still Has Limited Guest Tickets Available

Every year, the March of Dimes Signature Chefs Auction raises big money for healthier babies, and the magical feasting is happening tomorrow at 6:30 p.m. in the Omni Hotel. A little birdy tells me there are still tickets left. Andrew Chalk attended the event last year, and he seemed to really enjoy it. Jump to read the press release and info down below.

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MAX’S Wine Dive Dallas Announces “Team”

Dallas native Patrick Russell will be the executive chef at the soon-to-open Max’s Wine Dive on McKinney Avenue in Oak Lawn. Russell spent the last four years at Craft Dallas where he started as a line cook and ended as a sous chef. He’s now in the top-clog position and will preside over a staff that includes Adam Shallenberger former sous chef at Ellerbe Fine Foods in Fort Worth.

On the floor and in the cellar will be Paul (Dali, Nana) Pinnell and Mark Cotton. Pinnell will be generally managing with Cotton assisting. Juan Taboada, who put together a nice list at Decanter Restaurant and Wine Lounge, will be buying and managing the restaurant’s retail program.

Cue the press release

MAX’s Wine Dive is bringing its mantra of “Fried Chicken and Champagne?…why the hell not?!?” to Uptown Dallas. With a plethora of wines from around the world and expertly prepared gourmet comfort food, MAX’s provides an “urban-chic” atmosphere that is relaxed and unpretentious. Half of the menu will showcase MAX’s “Classics,” known to all MAX’s locations, including the Famous Southern Fried Chicken, The Texas “Haute” Dog, and Pan Borracho (“drunk bread”).  The other half of the menu will feature Chef Russell’s own creations – items which will be unique to Dallas – utilizing the freshest seasonal ingredients available.

Opening date is mid-September.

Bits & Bites: Things To Do and Chew in Dallas, July 27-29

This weekend I’m going to a BYOB painting class, and hopefully I’ll discover that I’m some sort of art genius instead of a blob artist. What are you doing? Oh, you don’t know yet? Here are some ways you can fill up your time in case you don’t feel like painting a Tuscan landscape with me.

Friday

Want to make new friends without joining an online group? Go to the “Meet and Eat” Dinner Party tonight at Bolsa Mercado. The menu is light and summer-y, and just the way it should be since the outside temperatures are too high for comfort. Join the fine people of Bolsa Mercado for a five-course dinner with summer berry soup, roasted hen, and sweet corn ravioli starting at 7:30 p.m. Cost is $75 per person (tax/gratuity included) and guests must email contact@bolsadallas.com or call 214.942.0451 to reserve a spot using a credit card.

Saturday

Erin’s compiled her weekly farmers market report for all you morning risers. If you still want berries, you better lug yourself to the closest market, because berries are starting to run out this season. Continue reading "Bits & Bites: Things To Do and Chew in Dallas, July 27-29"