The Avner Samuel; The Bailey. En fuego.

Whirling dervish chef Avner Samuel and his sidekick chef Jon Stevens are ready to open Snack, their “street-food-inspired-low price-points-small-plates-daily-chalkboard-special restaurant on Henderson in the space formerly known as Horne & Dekker. (Whew!) There will be three bar areas: one with cocktails, wine and beer; the second is a raw bar, but also includes a charcuterie element and hot small plates; the third, features a large wood-burning oven for made-to-order flatbreads and distinct hot dishes. (Whew!) Listen up:

From the age-old market-squares and bazaars to today’s street food vendors, SNACK is the creation of a street-to-table inspired menu. The menu includes dinner items such as short rib tacos with pineapple habanero and cilantro crema ($8), pork shumai dumplings ($9), chicken shawarmas with cucumber tahini and pickled onion ($8), and smoked oysters escabeche served with wood oven toasted bread ($7).  The brunch menu features items from a pan-fried egg sandwich with Serrano ham and avocado ($13), to a charcuterie flatbread with pan-fried egg, arugula and herbs ($14); and “street tacos” a la carte with a small assortment of sweeter entrees, like coconut griddle cakes ($11), to choose from.

Bizarre is right! Let’s see, Samuel-Stevens now oversee two locations of Nosh Euro Bistro, Snack, the transition of Bailey’s Prime Plus from steak joint to a chef-driven kitchen, and the addition of the lavish Aurora Room to BPP.  My guess is Samuel and Stevens already have their paws on the menu at The Chesterfield. What? You hear there will be more Nosh Euro Bistros if this relationship lasts? Oh, glorious Dallas dining. Are you coming back to life or going crazy?

UPDATE: Snack will have it’s own valet parking.

BAILEY’S PRIME PLUS SHOWCASES NEW MENU ITEMS FROM

LOCAL CELEBRITY CHEFS AVNER SAMUEL AND JON STEVENS

New Menu Launches at Park Lane Location on May 10th

DALLAS, TX (May 3, 2012) – Bailey’s Prime Plus is proud to announce that the new menu, created by Avner Samuel and Jon Stevens, will launch on May 10th at The Shops at Park Lane location.  Guests will be able to experience a new chef-driven menu that also features signature prime steaks.  Sample menu items include:

Appetizers

Beef Carpaccio shaved pecorino, arugula & dijon-creme fraiche

Jonah Crab & Artichoke Fritters caper & pine nut aioli

Maine Lobster “Parfait” crushed avocado, tomato confit & caviar vinaigrette

Grilled Lamb Merguez Sausage charmoula, tomato confit & black olives

Salads

Roasted Red & Yellow Beets fennel, oranges, candied pecans, goat cheese & arugula

Baby Iceberg Wedges creamy blue, red grape tomatoes, croutons & red onion

Heirloom Tomatoes & Bococinno basil oil & balsamic reduction

Entrees

Roasted Alaskan Halibut cauliflower puree, spring vegetables & mandarin sauce

Herb Roasted Free Range Chicken creamy polenta, “Panzanella” salad & sherry gastrique

Bailey’s Half Pound Wagyu Burger two cheddars, full set & fries

Bailey’s Prime Cuts

Bailey’s features prime steaks and chops including a 6 and 10 oz. Beef Tenderloin, 18 oz. Kansas City Strip and 22 oz. Bone In Ribeye.

Two weeks in Provence coming soon.

Get ready for Central Market’s yearly culinary salute to foreign food. In 2010, we celebrated Argentina (Hi, Francis!). Last year we pigged out on Spain (Hola, Paco!). This year they are throwing a two-week soiree for France, specifically the southern region of Provence, which will begin on May 9 and run through May 22.

Here’s a little poop I learned: Zee hottest ticket will be a seat in the outdoor tent where the kick-off event, “A Taste of Provence,” will feature a sampling of dishes prepared by Chef Patrice Olivon! C’est magnifique! You know Olivon, oui? He’s the cute French dude who won Iron Chef hosts “Dinner is Served,” a lovely show on PBS. It is set for Wednesday, May 9, and begins at 6 p.m.

The menu includes some personal favorites from his childhood (served family-style at long tables), which will be paired with French wines (shocker!). Think: Pissaladiere (thick, pizza-like dish popular in Nice and Marseilles); tomates farcies (tomatoes stuffed with beef, rice & herbs); cod with aioli; roasted lamb with ratatouille; and warm seasonal fruit cooked in red wine served over vanilla ice cream (really?). So frugal Francophiles, get a cheap trip ($35 per person) to Provence, if only for one evening.  Tickets can be booked by clicking here or by visiting the Cooking School reservation site for Dallas.

Sancerre! Profiteroles! A truffle in every pot! Vamos, I mean, nous permettre d’aller!

(Below, I will copy and paste an actual MEDIA-ONLY release so you can get an insider’s look on how real food writing works. I will pair it with commentary from a professional media person.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE [Loud and clear! Got it. Type fast. Did somebody else get this while I was grabbing a sandwich. Hang on let me check the other sites!]

April 1, 2012 [WTF? Am I late here? It's April 16. Did this already go out and I am so screwed? Note to self: Google news before you write it. Alternatively, swear under your breath at PR people.]

CENTRAL MARKET PREPARES TO SHARE “L’ART DE VIVRE” [WHY didn't I think of that hed? (That's editorial lingo for headline. We are all too lazy to type the whole word out.]

Prepare for a gustatory tour of France’s famously food centric regions [Weak sub. Oh, that's edit-speak for sub-headline. Waaaay too long to type. "Food-centric regions" in France  is redundant.]

WHO: All Central Market stores across Texas [ Great start. WHO! Always start with WHO. It worked for Horton and it will work for you.]

WHAT: Get ready to celebrate two weeks devoted to France, a country know for its vast array of distinct food and wine offerings. Central Market, a division of H-E-B will host PASSPORT FRANCE May 9 – 22 to explore the delicious to be found in every day France, “a nation of Foodies.” [Yes, it pedestrian but it's short and to the point and food writers need short. And points. Next.]

This is the specialty retailer’s third foray into a wide-scale international celebration. In 2011, Central Market hosted Passport Spain; and in 2010 it launched with Passport Argentina.  Customers traveled the cultural and culinary landscape of these countries without booking a plane ticket or packing a bag. The events are known for their bounty of exciting food finds, live music and performers, authentic décor and celebrity chef and wine maker visits. [Great insert of backfill information. If I didn't work here last year, I now know how much great stuff I missed by living in Washington, DC.]

This May, CM store visitors can experience all things French during Central Market’s two-week extravaganza. Hands-on crepe making. Wine tastings hosted by winemakers, some part of multigenerational winemaking families. Stellar chefs such as Anne Willan of La Varenne and Patrice Olivon of PBS and Iron Chef fame will make appearances and host events. “An Introduction to French Cheeses” will be hosted by the Ambassadress of the French Cheese Club. [Okay, I'm fading a little.]

The aisles will be filled with finds from around France, such as La Mere de Poulard cookies, Kougin Amann, aged Comte, Petit Montebourg fresh cheese, Fallot Dijon and hundreds more, many exclusively available at Central Market. [I'm am so back. Those cookies are like crack, heroin, pot, and gin all baked into a thin disc of sin.]

From classes in the art of French cookery to French cheeses, breads and wine tastings, Passport France will take visitors on an incredible gustatory tour with no jet lag. [Well, I am confused. What do I do with all of this Ambien?]

WHEN: May 9 – 22, 2012 [Excellent information. Thank you Central Market for making my job a walk in the freaking park!]

WHERE: Central Market, all store locations: Austin, Dallas, Fort Worth, Houston, Plano,  San Antonio, and Southlake. Go to www.centralmarket.com for the latest details and to review classes available in May. Further details will be released as they are available. [Even bettah! There is more to come so I know there will be more to write. My job feels secure. Until the end of May.]

ABOUT CENTRAL MARKET: Central Market’s open, serpentine-flow, full view European-style layout offers a completely new food shopping experience.  A bountiful produce department with unmatched quality and variety, an 80-foot seafood case with selections from throughout the world, hundreds of cheeses, 2,500 wine labels, stupendous specialty grocery aisles with delights from every continent, and a world-class cooking school featuring hands-on instruction are among the features that make the Central Market experience unique. www.centralmarket.com. [Oaky, the serpentine-flow thing is getting old, but so am I. The store is really more maze-like but I suppose that would cause people to run for the straight aisles of Tom Thumb. Stupendous is a bit dramatic and delights, well my mind stayed to another train of thought, but I was immediately brought back to reality by the hands-on instruction. Oh, yes. France and hands. Good stuff. Count me in.]

Slow-cooked pork covered with caramelized onions and peppers.

Nick Badovinus and chef Dan Riley have been hunkered down for over a year developing the menu and creating all kinds of delicious roasted meats for Off-Site Kitchen. Today he is finally opening the doors!

Now, hold your horses. The dining room is tiny. Off-Site Kitchen is basically a take-out restaurant with a few stools inside and some picnic tables outside. Here are some pictures of what you can expect. The food, inspired by “what line cooks eat,” is basically simple sandwiches and breakfast burritos made from quality roasted meats. Roll the Badovinus quote of the year:

“It’s light industrial food,” he said. “It’s the kind of food you want to eat before you go solder something.”

Off-Site Kitchen will be open for lunch only from 10:30AM until 3PM for the next two weeks. Then the breakfast menu will kick in and they will begin serving at 7AM and will remain open until 7PM. “After we hit our stride, we’ll start rolling out the meat-by-the-pound program,” Badovinus said. “I’m so excited. This place is a real man cave.”

The original date for OSK’s opening was February 14, 2011. After Badovinus missed his mark, he decided to workshop the place and open on Valentine’s Day this year. “You see how many financial sacrifices I made to pay for my original vision,” Badovinus said. “I mean I’ve got a wheelbarrow of pork rinds down here. Who doesn’t love that?”

Badovinus was only half-joking about the Valentine’s Day opening. He and chef Dan Riley have used the Off-Site Kitchen space to tweak the menus of Badovinus’ other restaurants (Neighborhood Services, Neighborhood Services Tavern, and Neighborhood Services Bar & Grill). They also use the huge kitchen as a commissary for the other restaurants. The receive, portion, and distribute all of the meat and seafood at Off-Site Kitchen.

SOLDER, EAT, REPORT. No call-in orders. Plan to show up and wait.

[Also, Neighborhood Services Bar & Grill in Preston Royal will open for lunch in two weeks.]

The menu and photos are below.

Wheelbarrow of pork rinds.

Cherry cola pie.

Green chile cheeseburger.

First customer.

My Astro-Weenie Christmas Tree contribution to D Magazine's holiday party.Circa 2008.

Three years ago, I introduced you to Charles Phoenix, the “Ambassador of Americana.” More importantly, I introduced you to his “recipe” for the Astro-Weenie Christmas Tree. (I made several for the D Magazine holiday party in 2008.  Co-workers still stalk me for my secret herbal ingredient.)

Well, thanks to SideDish, Phoenix’s  career and has catapulted over hosting grade school field trips and roller skating parties to doing national TV spots with Martha Stewart and commenting on NPR. (Rawlins in drag?) I think it’s time to bring back the Astro-Weenie recipe. Remember, as they say in England, you can always make one suitable for vegetarians. Mind your head.

Off-Site Kitchen: These goodies will be available for consumption by "the end of this year."

Well folks, it has been a year since Nick Badovinus leased the former Danny’s Chicken spot at Wycliff and Irving Blvd. for Off-Site Kitchen, a mostly take-out spot featuring “light industrial food” inspired by “what line cooks eat.” Basically the menu is simple sandwiches, breakfast burritos, quality roasted meats by the pound.

Badovinus went silent for a long time. In September I dropped by Off-Site Kitchen to see WTF was up. Badovinus is a tough dude to find when he doesn’t want to be found. But there he was, deep in R&D, curing sausage, flipping burgers, trying out different meat combinations for sandwiches.

This morning, I called Badovinus for an update. As Badovinus talked about the opening date, menu, and concept, I enjoyed listening to him spin off on how the dynamic of opening this restaurant changed as it came to life. It’s almost trite to say that many entrepreneurs start with a grand design and find that once their plan goes from paper to brick and mortar, some details have to change. However, one thing I’ve learned over the years is this: those who allow the on-the-fly changes to overwhelm their original vision rarely succeed. Staying the course can be the difference between success and failure. And what Badovinus has already discovered about his little soon-to-open Off-Site Kitchen is unique and could prove to be a model for others.

Jump for it.

OSK Jalapeño cheddar sausage.

NN: I haven’t touched base with you since September when you said you were putting the finishing touches on Off-Site Kitchen. What’s going on?

NB: Man, we are having a blast. We’ve been down here for two months making and hanging sausages, hot links, chorizo, jalapeno cheese sausage. We’re going crazy with three immersion circulators doing 36-hour sous vide pork loin ribs in a hoisin-base glaze which we finish off on the grill at NHS. We’ve ended up using this place a lot more than I originally thought I would.

NN: You mean you are using more like a commissary for your three restaurants?

NB: Well, we started OSK not only as a restaurant but as a butchering plant, if you will, for all of the meat and fish for all three of our restaurants. You know, like we’re becoming our own producer. Our fish order hits DFW, then our back door, and we’ve got it butchered, portioned, cryovaced and on crushed ice within two hours. We’ve got control over our product.

NN: So once you got going, the energy shifted. Would that be fair to say?

NB: You know the hardest part of growing a business is there are certain things that you love to do that you can’t do any more. Like when the fish or meat comes. I love that. I don’t get to see that as much with three places. Every day at OSK is like Christmas morning and I get to open the stuff up and see it. Now it all comes to one place.

NN: Has that encouraged you to do more? Like make more than what you originally planned?

Dan "The Marzipan Diesel" Riley & hanging sausage! Photo by Nick Badovinus.

NB: We’re producing a lot more at OSK. What used to take “Fillet” [butcher Jose Martin] 50 hours a week, now gets done in 30 hours. So, we say “hey what else can we make?” This place has become kind of a clubhouse for the staff. They pop in and we all hang out and sorta jam on new stuff. It’s created a real sense of family. Hey, Fillet and I go all the way back to Nick and Sam’s. We wanted to do our own sausage and now we’ve got time to make more. Like I said we are having a ball with those immersion circulators. We’re buying cuts of meat that are a bitch to cook like Waygu rib ends and fingers (the meat between the bones), softening them, pounding them out and chicken-frying them. They’re on the menu at all NHS. Now we’re on to pepperoni.

NN: Well, it’s cool to have a culinary clubhouse but are you going to make Off-Site Kitchen a restaurant?

NB: Yeah, I’ve got to get that done by the end of the year. For tax purposes if nothing else.

Oh yeah, it's for real.

We’re suckers for any press release that contains the following sentences:

• Yes, this is really real.
• Don’t you judge us; we all knew it would end up here someday.
• And yeah, your right we probably did go too far this time.
• Sorry, Mom.

It seems a couple well-intentioned entrepreneurs have teamed up with J&D’s Foods to create a little something they’re calling baconlube—the world’s first bacon-flavored, water-based, American-made, personal lubricant.

Billing itself as the “gold standard of meat-flavored massage oils” (natch) baconlube, they say, is like the McRib of sex: it’s delicious, makes men crazy, is here for a limited time, and is in short supply.

If you’re thinking “stocking stuffer!” (let’s stay on track here), we’re right behind you. But the boys only made 3,000 bottles of this pork-flavored nectar. It hit the interwebs yesterday at www.baconlube.com. How much, you ask, for a product that promises such a satisfying holiday season? Only $11.99.

you know you want more. jump for it…Still on the fence? Here’s a little rationalization.

FACT – People are passionate about bacon.  According to a recent survey of Canadians by Maple Leaf Foods, Canada’s market leader in the bacon category, when asked to choose between bacon and sex, more than four in 10 (43%) chose bacon.  Thanks to baconlube, Canadians will never have to choose between two of life’s greatest pleasures again.  So you’re welcome Canada, you’re welcome – we’ve got your back.

Need I mention, we’ve requested a sample?

Grass does not grow beneath Teresa Gubbins' shoes.

Leave it to Teresa “Gumshoe” Gubbins to find a snitch in Trader Joe’s camp. Since the grocery chain announced they were planning locations in Dallas last May, they have been quite secretive about their locations. According to TG, you can rule out the former location on Greenville Ave. Her Deep Throat coughs up three possible locations: Walnut Hill and Central, Knox Ave., and Fort Worth. All of the details are here.

There was a time when Trader Joe’s was cool and funky and carried stuff you couldn’t find elsewhere, but I think the company is now running on a tired image. In the 70s,  Two Buck Chuck played a significant role in nursing wine drinkers off the Spanada bottle but the last TBC I sampled burned the enamel off my teeth. So, Trader Joe’s? Yes or no? Why?

Hunky Town, Twin Pricks, Tooter’s, Pecker’s Hot Italian Sausage, Tube Steak Junction, Cake Balls to the Walls, Nuts and Butts, Quickies, Long Dong Silver, Tally Whacker’s, Love Mussels, Wee Willie’s, Twig and Berries.

Ladies, the floor is open.

Here is a sample from one:

When tourists and travellers arrive in a new city, one of the first things they often look for is a place to grab a bite or get a good drink. Now, if they want to know where to find their favorite bar scene before they head out, they can turn to SceneTap, which shows the following in real time:

·         Number of people in the bar

·         Male-to-female ratio

·         Average age of patrons in the bar

·         Food and drink specials

SceneTap is a free app for iPhone, Android and the Web, and it gathers this information anonymously using facial detection cameras and “people-counting” technologies in participating bars.The app launched in Chicago in July and is expanding its network to a number of other major cities soon. More than 250 bars around the U.S. have signed up so far.

Here’s a stupid question. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Reader Reviews for KRLD Restaurant Week start next Tuesday!

Dishers! It’s that time of the year: KRLD Restaurant year month Week. The event kicks off on Monday, August 15 and beginning Tuesday, August 16, we will have a daily post dedicated to your reviews of the restaurants you sample during RW. We know a lot of chefs will be cooking their butts off for you and many servers will do double shifts. We ask you to send in the names of servers who treated you to over-the-top service and we will honor them on SideDish. (Take their picture!)

Last year KRLD Restaurant Week raised $605,500 for its supporting partners — the North Texas Food Bank (NTFB) in Dallas and Lena Pope Home in Fort Worth — with more than 100,000 prix fixe dinners served in 138 restaurants across Collin, Dallas, Denton and Tarrant County.

In case you were born yesterday:

KRLD Restaurant Week presented by Central Market, which showcases North Texas’ thriving culinary scene, features tasty three-course prix fixe dinner combinations priced at only $35/person (tax, tip and drinks billed separately). What’s more, consumer patronage helps support local fine dining establishments and two great charity partners. For every prix fixe meal purchased, participating restaurants will make a $7.00 donation to either the North Texas Food Bank in Dallas or Lena Pope Home in Fort Worth. Reservations are required, and diners should specify “KRLD Restaurant Week” when booking.

Book it here.