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Top Chef: Texas, Episode 14 Recap

Part 1: Quickfire/Asian Domination

Last week, the chefs realized that one of the losing contestants (either Bev or Grayson) would be returning through Last Chance Kitchen, which would increase their numero to cinco. Sarah (who looks like Austin Eater editor Andrea Grimes, don’t you think?) is noticeably disappointed when Bev walks through the doors to compete with the other four in this elimination challenge because tiny Bev is a fierce competitor. She is a beast.

Now three out of the five contestants are repping the Asian continent. I would just like to point that out. #minoritypride

Jump for more shenanigans.

Padma then tells the chefs they have to walk around with blindfolds as they’re gathering ingredients. They must use every single ingredient they pick up, and the winner gets to choose between a new Prius v or a spot in the final four. Poor Bev. Half of the time, she is nowhere near anything edible; and the other half, she is feeling everybody up. (Not a bad excuse to bump into Paul, eh?) Bev and Paul undercook their fish and prawn (respectively) while Sarah and Ed’s dishes stand out to the judges. Ultimately, the corn soup with red chili and peaches that Sarah whipped up earns her a spot in the final four. She declines the Prius v (dumb, so dumb..) and chooses to spend the rest of her day lollygagging instead of competing in the elimination challenge. LUCKY HER.

Part 2: Elimination Challenge

Tom and Padma introduce the next part of this saga: The cheftestants must create a dish that will please their mentors. Somebody cue the waterworks. As soon as the mentors file in, Paul spots his Uchiko boss of eight years, Tyson, and immediately turns into a blubbering fountain of tears. Eventually, all the chefs start crying as introduce their mentors to the judges. Then the mentors start tearing up too, and the whole situation just turns into a big gooey mess.

Nobody wants to make their mentor look bad at the judging table, so the pressure is on. Since there aren’t any fresh oysters in Whole Foods, Ed picks up pre-smoked oysters which everyone knows is a dumb move except for Ed because he’s stressing himself out. Ugh. While Ed’s in the kitchen cooking his stupid smoked oysters, he says, “I just hope I didn’t psyche myself out.” Double sigh. Bravo, please keep all the heavy foreshadowing to yourself. I don’t want Ed to leave.

Part 3: Judging Table

While Sarah is off frolicking with her mentor, Paul cooks a chilled sunchoke and dashi soup, Bev fires up BBQ noodles with a risky wok move, Ed makes braised pork belly with pickles, and Lindsay adds too much cream to her seafood stew with mussels and clams. When the judges realize Ed bought smoked oysters instead of fresh ones, Padma nicely tells Ed to “please pack his knives and go.” Oh, Ed. Whyyyy did you have to pick those stupid smoked oysters? It’s OK, though, because at least this means I get to see you tomorrow with Michelle Obama.

Episode 15 Preview

The fearsome final four are in British Columbia, cooking Canadian game in thick jackets and snow boots. Is anyone else confused? I thought this show was supposed to be about Texas.

7 comments on “Top Chef: Texas, Episode 14 Recap

  1. Pingback: Even For $600,000, Top Chef: Texas Can’t Tell the Difference Between Dallas and San Antonio | FrontBurner

  2. As soon as Ed took the smoked oysters at Whole Foods, I yelled NOOOOOO. Always the kiss of death on Top Chef, hasn’t he seen this show? Paul FTW now that Ed’s gone!

  3. This season has really made my head hurt, even though I love cheering for Austin’s Paul. Toxic Texan yee-ha crap, horrific Padmawear (although last night’s was fine; she finally abandoned demin) and, as frontburner observed, establishing shots that establish only that nobody knows what Texas cities look like. Please. Toddle off to BC. At least they have oysters up there.

  4. I couldn’t take Ed’s dentation issue anymore.

    He almost dislocated his jaw when he said “horror”.

  5. I’m glad Scagnetti brought up Ed’s odd cow-chewing-grass-like jaw. When I watched him speak I found myself trying to recreate the movement. Of course the joke was on me because I was sitting over a Nighthawk dinner.