Whole Foods Steers Me Wrong on Valentine’s Day Meal

Last night, I had a Valentine’s Day dish in mind that I’ve prepared with some success in the past. I don’t have a name for it. Let’s call it Tim’s VD Special. Here’s the recipe for Tim’s VD Special: get one (1) large shelled prawn; wrap it with one (1) orange roughy fillet; top with tomato slice; skewer the whole shebang with toothpick; bake at 350 until done. A dash of lemon juice, crack some pepper on that dude. Bingo. Your lady (or man) is guaranteed to love Tim’s VD Special or your money back.

So to Whole Foods in Lakewood I go to acquire my ingredients. Know what the woman in charge of the seafood counter told me? They don’t sell orange roughy because it’s not sustainable. I’m okay with this policy. First, because you know before you walk into the store that that’s what you’re going to get at Whole Foods: hippy-dippy, love-the-planet, drive-Glenn-Hunter-nuts environmentalism. You can’t complain about seeing boobs if you walk into a topless joint. Right? Same thing with Whole Foods. And, listen. I parked my Prius in one of those spots that Whole Foods reserves for hybrid cars. You think you hate me? I hate myself. I’m fine with that. And, second, I’m okay with Whole Foods’ fish policy because I’m well aware that fish stocks across the globe are collapsing. We ought to do what we can (even though I doubt it’ll be enough).

Continue reading "Whole Foods Steers Me Wrong on Valentine’s Day Meal"